The Spotlight: Country Living

Mmm… Take in that fresh air. Good morning, Alex. You look like you’re doing well. I have done it, Sandy. I have figured out the secret to happiness! Oh wow! That’s significant! I’ve been meditating at Tranquility Divine Resort for the last week. It’s given me the chance I need to cleanse my thoughts of all the distraction… And ask myself the deeper questions about happiness, purpose and fufilment. That and allow my caffeine to drop below hazardous levels. Hoo-ah… Feels good to be able to see in color again. Why do your answers always lead to so many more questions…? Because I’m an interesting guy! Which is a curse, really. The secret to eternal happiness goes against my very nature. And to take the first steps towards it, I must speak to the mayor. The mayor? What business do you have with her? Oh hey! I’m going to ask her for a plot of land. Does that mean I wont catch you sleeping on the sidewalk anymore? I’ve told you! I’ve never once chosen to sleep on the sidewalk. And yet it keeps happening… That’s great news. You’re going to become a true Fable resident! Yep! No more of this strange in-between lifestyle. What are you going to be? You’ll need a job to live here. I’m going to be… a rancher! A… rancher… Seriously? Ladies, don’t fret. COUNTRY LIVING IS THE LIFE FOR ME! It came to me while I was in the water. For a brief moment, my charkras aligned and I saw the answer. The secret to eternal happiness is simplicity! And that is no BULL. Especially when the STEAKS are this high. You have to MILK happiness for all it’s worth. You don’t mean… That’s right. It’s time for another… THE SPOTLIGHT Featuirng the MOOving beauties that are cattle and all country hijinks. As always, feel free to give your suggestions on the KEMONO CAFE PATREON or in the FABLE GAZETTE on the KEMONO CAFE DISCORD SERVER. Isn’t it great?! If I’m a rancher, I can MILK all the cattle puns I want since no one else will get upset! Um… Alex. You might want to rethink this. Why? I’m not STEERING the conversation in the wrong direction. Let him get it out of his system. It’s the only way. What’s the matter? Afraid of grabbing life by the HORNS? Behind you… Why? All I see is an incredibly buff bo… Uh-oh Um… You think country life is simple, huh? Let me show you the crazy shit happening on my farm right now. That’ll set you straight. C’mere! OOooh man those arms are big. Put me down! Aren’t you going to stop them? I think the circus needs to leave town for a while. Don’t you? Maybe Alex would actually be happy in a circus! *giggle* Yeah. Thanks for tuning in, everyone! See you next time!